The Problem of Pornography
Some of you may be surprised that a female is speaking on this subject. But given the number of people in my life, both male and female that struggle with this sin, I feel the need to speak on it a bit (although as mentioned on my first post, I openly acknowledge that I am not wise, and probably do not have much insight to bring). This entry exists because people need to talk about it. There's an underlying fear or hesitation to talk about it. At this point, shutting your mouth will not help anyone. I know this is a sensitive subject, but here's the deal. There is a huge problem with porn, especially in the United States, amongst females as well as males. And it has to stop. It has a huge affect on a person's spiritual life (if you are indeed a Christian), but we'll dive into that in a minute. It literally changes your brain; it is a drug. Your heart feels the affect, too. It can and will severely damage your relationships. On non-individual scale, it increases the demand for pornography, prostitution, and leads often times leads to rape and sexual violence. Not to mention sex outside of marriage as a whole. It is a lie, a poor imitation of something beautiful and God-given that says "this will be all you need to satisfy you".
There is something deeper here. We can talk about how wrong it is all day, the facts and figures, and what needs to change on the surface level. Ultimately, it's not the porn itself that is the root of problem; it's the heart. Every sin is that way. In lusting, a person spits in God's face by trying to reap the intimacy that God has reserved for marriage. Our Creator has woven together a beautiful picture of how intimate Christ and the church are. Yet, in seeking after our own passions, we become the prostitute. With Christ as the bridegroom of the church, any sin paints us a wayward bride seeking satisfaction elsewhere than His abounding glory. I cannot begin to accurately describe how tragic this is.
It would be a hopeless statement if it ended there. There is Good News, and it's the Gospel. It is the Good News. I can't talk about sin without sharing the Gospel. Jesus is our hope of salvation, our hope of sanctification (killing our sin, be it pornography, drugs, gossip, etc and becoming more like Jesus) our only hope of truly being changed from the inside out. We are reconciled to God by Christ's sacrifice of perfect life on the cross. God breaks into our hearts and shows us our desperate need for Him, and how incapable we are of saving ourselves. And he is more than capable of forgiving your sin. Don't feel like pornography is "too big" of a mess in your life for God to erase; that's putting the Master of the universe, your Creator in a box. He loves us more than we are capable of understanding.
So, with that being said, here's some things I have learned through people opening up to me. These are things that really need to be done, should this be a sin you struggle with:
1. ACCOUNTABILITY. Accountability, accountability, accountability.
Let me say it one more time; accountability. Find someone you trust (not of the opposite gender, but that's a whole other subject) and talk about it. Let them ask you hard questions, and check up on you. Pick someone that will help you get to the root of your sin, not just slap you on the hand when you stumble. If you need more than one person, pick a few people that will be intentional. James 5:16 "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."
2. Coming to terms with how you have treated someone.
In viewing pornography, at some point you have to accept that you have de-humanized women (or men). Pornography takes someone's child, a person that God created and takes away everything except their ability to have sex. Clicking and watching equates to "only your body matters, and I will use it for my own desires". And that's a discussion you'll have to have with your future or current spouse. You'll never be able to apologize to the people you have viewed directly for that, but God can grant you forgiveness. See Ephesians 2 https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians+2%3A1-22&version=ESV
3. Avoiding Triggers
Simply put, if being alone with your computer at night leads to sin, put some safeguards in place so that doesn't happen. If listening to secular music on the radio leads to sin, finds some CD's or plug in your iTunes. Don't assume that "It's okay, I'll be alright this time. I've got it under control now". It's better to underestimate yourself than to overestimate yourself in this situation. For the same reason it's not the best idea for a recovering alcoholic to just go chill out in a bar. He might be just fine, but putting himself into the way of temptation just isn't worth it.
4. Seek after the Lord
This is the most important one. Seek Him first, with all of your shame, lust, and lies. His grace is sufficient for you. I could spend so much more time talking about this one, but I think an example from the Bible would be better than my own words.
There is something deeper here. We can talk about how wrong it is all day, the facts and figures, and what needs to change on the surface level. Ultimately, it's not the porn itself that is the root of problem; it's the heart. Every sin is that way. In lusting, a person spits in God's face by trying to reap the intimacy that God has reserved for marriage. Our Creator has woven together a beautiful picture of how intimate Christ and the church are. Yet, in seeking after our own passions, we become the prostitute. With Christ as the bridegroom of the church, any sin paints us a wayward bride seeking satisfaction elsewhere than His abounding glory. I cannot begin to accurately describe how tragic this is.
It would be a hopeless statement if it ended there. There is Good News, and it's the Gospel. It is the Good News. I can't talk about sin without sharing the Gospel. Jesus is our hope of salvation, our hope of sanctification (killing our sin, be it pornography, drugs, gossip, etc and becoming more like Jesus) our only hope of truly being changed from the inside out. We are reconciled to God by Christ's sacrifice of perfect life on the cross. God breaks into our hearts and shows us our desperate need for Him, and how incapable we are of saving ourselves. And he is more than capable of forgiving your sin. Don't feel like pornography is "too big" of a mess in your life for God to erase; that's putting the Master of the universe, your Creator in a box. He loves us more than we are capable of understanding.
So, with that being said, here's some things I have learned through people opening up to me. These are things that really need to be done, should this be a sin you struggle with:
1. ACCOUNTABILITY. Accountability, accountability, accountability.
Let me say it one more time; accountability. Find someone you trust (not of the opposite gender, but that's a whole other subject) and talk about it. Let them ask you hard questions, and check up on you. Pick someone that will help you get to the root of your sin, not just slap you on the hand when you stumble. If you need more than one person, pick a few people that will be intentional. James 5:16 "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."
2. Coming to terms with how you have treated someone.
In viewing pornography, at some point you have to accept that you have de-humanized women (or men). Pornography takes someone's child, a person that God created and takes away everything except their ability to have sex. Clicking and watching equates to "only your body matters, and I will use it for my own desires". And that's a discussion you'll have to have with your future or current spouse. You'll never be able to apologize to the people you have viewed directly for that, but God can grant you forgiveness. See Ephesians 2 https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians+2%3A1-22&version=ESV
3. Avoiding Triggers
Simply put, if being alone with your computer at night leads to sin, put some safeguards in place so that doesn't happen. If listening to secular music on the radio leads to sin, finds some CD's or plug in your iTunes. Don't assume that "It's okay, I'll be alright this time. I've got it under control now". It's better to underestimate yourself than to overestimate yourself in this situation. For the same reason it's not the best idea for a recovering alcoholic to just go chill out in a bar. He might be just fine, but putting himself into the way of temptation just isn't worth it.
4. Seek after the Lord
This is the most important one. Seek Him first, with all of your shame, lust, and lies. His grace is sufficient for you. I could spend so much more time talking about this one, but I think an example from the Bible would be better than my own words.
In 1 Samuel, Israel wanted a king, to be like the rest of the world. So they picked the handsomest one they could find, despite God's warning about it. Although God did not stop them from defying Him, Samuel had this to say in 2:20-22 "...Do not fear. You have done all this wickedness; yet do not turn aside from following The Lord with all your heart. And do not turn aside; for then you would go after empty things which cannot profit or deliver, for they are nothing. For The Lord will not forsake His people, for His great name's sake, because it has pleased The Lord to make you His people."
Until next time.
[More about the facts here: http://www.fightthenewdrug.org/get-the-facts/ This a secular website, but they do know their stuff and are passionate about the anti-porn movement.]
[More about the facts here: http://www.fightthenewdrug.org/get-the-facts/ This a secular website, but they do know their stuff and are passionate about the anti-porn movement.]
Comments
Post a Comment